Earning The Privilege of Leadership!

Some families obviously stand out above the rest! When you meet them and as you get to know them, this conviction is strengthened. They are fresh and alive, and each family member is enthusiastic, motivated, and productive. When we look even closer at such families, we soon discover a spiritual leader who has qualities not found in the average person. He or she is the kind of leader who excels by employing a workable strategy. We want to be that kind of father and parent!

As a spiritual leader, Timothy was urged to conduct himself in a manner that no one would look down on his youthfulness in a condescending way. You know, “He is too young to lead himself, much less anyone else!” So Paul counselled Timothy to earn the respect of the people he was appointed to lead. But, how was he going to do that? How can we earn the privilege of leading others? Though we have the right and authority to lead, have we earned the privilege to influence the lives of others? Paul indicates we can earn the opportunity to truly influence others by becoming “an example of the believers, in word, in conversation, in charity, in spirit, in faith, in purity.”(1 Tim. 4:12). Though these guidelines apply to all areas of leadership application, I would like to apply these principles to a father and his family. This strategy also wonderfully applies to a single mother trying to raise her children in the Lord. Accordingly, a father or parent must provide a good example: Paul did not offer general motivations by merely saying “Be a good example.” No the faithful old apostle issued a checklist:

Be An Example With Your Words (1 Tim. 4:12)

The conversation of the servant of God is to be exemplary. Jesus made it extremely clear that whatever comes out of the mouth reveals what is in the person’s heart. Matthew 12:34, O generation of vipers, how can ye, being evil, speak good things? for out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaketh.

Matthew 12:37, For by thy words thou shalt be justified, and by thy words thou shalt be condemned.

      1.  Use True Words.

Proverbs 12:22, Lying lips are abomination to the Lord: but they that deal truly are his delight.

      2.  Use Controlled Words.

In Eph. 4:26 Paul says, “be ye angry, and sin not.” There’s a place for holy wrath and righteous indignation, but not for the sin of anger—especially the smoldering kind that lasts into the next day and longer.

Proverbs 25:28, He that hath no rule over his own spirit is like a city that is broken down, and without walls.  (See Col. 4:6).

      3.  Use Gracious Words.

Eph. 4:29 says, “let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth.” The speech of a believer should never be less than pure. It is embarrassing to hear someone who claims to serve Jesus Christ speak ungodly words. That just reveals a dirty heart. There’s no place for corrupt or filthy communication in the Christian life.  Speech that glorifies God “is good to the use of edifying, that it may minister grace unto the hearers” (v. 29).

Be An Example Through Your Conversation (Conduct) 1 Tim. 4:12

You are to be a model of righteous living—a person who lives out his convictions based on Biblical principles. Nothing about you should cause shame for the name of Christ.  The things you do the places you go, the things you possess—every aspect of your life is a sermon.  That sermon either contradicts or substantiates what you say.

Make your example count through consistently emphasizing godliness.  Remember the future and welfare of your family is at stake. Lead them with your good lifestyle! We cannot become holy on our own, but God gave us his Holy Spirit to help us obey and to give us power to overcome sin. Don't use the excuse that you can't help slipping into sin. Call on God's power to free you from sin's grip.

Be An Example Through Charity (Love) 1 Tim. 4:12

Ministering to your family in love doesn’t necessarily mean you’re a hugger and kisser. There is absolutely nothing at all wrong with warm expressions of family affection, but there is more to love than this. The Apostle Paul and Epaphroditus showed their love to the church by hard work (1Thess. 2:7-12); Phil. 2:27-30).  We all are to offer self-sacrificing service on behalf of others; this is especially true at home. 

When we say the right words and live the right way but lack love, we are demonstrating a wrong view of God's expectations (1 Cor. 13:1-7).   Love is a primary motivation in all of Christian living.  Love is made visible through actions of help, assistance, correction, affection, re-enforcement, and interest.  After words and actions have had their say, love makes the message ring true or false.  Little girls and boys need desperately the love of their godly father.  I still believe that the main key to preventing fornication among young unmarried people is the right kind of affection at home.  The same could be said for gangs, drugs, and alcohol.

Be An Example In Spirit (1 Tim. 4:12)

       1.  Inner Enthusiasm. ‘In spirit’ . . . describe the inner enthusiasm and excitement of a child of God” says Warren W. Wiersbe. Therefore, the word “spirit” refers to excitement, eagerness, intensity, passion, exuberance, and zeal.  It describes the child of God as bubbling over with an irrepressible fervor.

       2.  Spiritual Enthusiasm.  Guy King concluded that “spirit” refers to enthusiasm and describes it as a:

“ . . . . quality strangely lacking from the make-up of many Christians.  Plenty of enthusiasm  for a football match, or for an election campaign, but so little of it for the service of God.  How the magnificent enthusiasm of the Christian Scientists, the Jehovah’s Witnesses, the Communists should put us to shame.   Oh for the flaming zeal again that once the church knew.  This fine spirit will greatly help Timothy as he seeks to consolidate the position and to advance the line.” —Guy King, Leader, 79

The excellent parent is to exemplify spiritual enthusiasm in his Life, Labor and to his Lord.  How shameful it is to see the Lord’s servants work with a poor, reluctant, complaining spirit, or with little excitement, or enthusiasm about the work of the Lord.  Just one extra-long drawn out drudgery!   

Be An Example In Faith (1 Tim. 4:12)

The word “faith” carries the idea of ‘faithfulness,’ ‘trustworthiness,’ ‘consistency’ or ‘fidelity.’                                                                                                                          

     1.  Faith Is Made Evident in Faithfulness.

Timothy was to be consistent, faithful, and trustworthy in his ministry. People can follow that kind of a leader.  Consistency separates those who succeed from those who fail.

1 Cor. 4:2, Moreover it is required in stewards, that a man be found faithful.

At all times and in all trials show your family, how they ought to maintain unshaken confidence in God by your example!  Weather it is tithing, soul winning, singing, praying, Bible reading, burden bearing, or waiting on God; be faithful at all times.

      2.  Faith is Made Evident in Fidelity.  (Dependability)

Fidelity is being faithful to your Ministry, to your flock, to your class, to your home and family, to the public, and certainly to your God. Fidelity means the people who know you have NO doubts about you; they are free to depend on you always without regret or reluctance.

           a. Preserving All. Fidelity consists in honestly keeping, preserving, and coming through when required. This involves whatever is entrusted to our care. It is preserved from lose or damage in our care.  This is the goal of every godly father—he desires to preserve his entire family from sin, Satan, and hell. 

           b. Improving All. Improving whatever is placed in our trust for improvement.  It is better than it was because of our faithful care.  Seek to develop servants for Jesus Christ through your family ministry is the idea here. While it is wonderful when a family produces a good doctor, a solid lawyer, a business strategist, a strong godly pastor, the aim is to fully develop each family member to reach their potential in Christ!

The Lord Jesus Christ was absolutely faithful to His Father and as a Good Steward of the Disciples that the Father gave Him, He lost none of them.  Every genuine convert was preserved and improved under the Lord Jesus’ faithful care and ministry! John 17:12, While I was with them in the world, I kept them in thy name: those that thou gavest me I have kept, and none of them is lost, but the son of perdition; that the scripture might be fulfilled. 

John 18:9, That the saying might be fulfilled, which he spake, Of them which thou gavest me have I lost none.

Beloved, decide that you will lose nothing that God commits to your charge, and you will improve every precious gift that He gives.  Every person, opportunity, moment, and ability faithfully employed in His work to preserve and improve what He gave you to work with! Preserve and improve your family—you are the leader. By the grace of God take the initiative. Don’t be a hit and miss dad who emphasize spiritual and family matters for a short period and then forget all about it, but be consistent and faithful to your family. They need a faithful investor into their spiritual and moral welfare. They require a model to follow; the model you provide them. Decide to provide them with that mentor and example every day and always. Give them the kind of attention that will shape them for Christ.

Be An Example of Purity (1 Tim. 4:12)

Paul ended emphasizing virtue and chastity. The word “purity” refers not only to sexual chastity, but also to the motives and intents of the heart.  If your heart is pure, your behavior will be pure as well.  This implies integrity and consistency and reinforces the entire list. History has shown us that a family can be devastated by sexual impurity on the part of the parents. Men in leadership are vulnerable in that area when they let their guard down. We all must maintain absolute moral purity. Parents cannot effectively influence their children to be pure, when they are unwilling to live out this standard for themselves. Do as I say, and not as I do simply does not fly!
These are all vital constituents of Christian living. Carelessness in any one of these areas can spell failure and even disaster. The above qualities are to be developed, not just for public display, but as the uniform texture of our life.

Some families stand out visibly above the rest! They are fresh and alive, and the people involved are enthusiastic, motivated, and productive. Looking behind the scenes, you find a leader who has qualities not found in the average person. He or she is a leader who excels. Be that kind of father!